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Because men have different ideas about these things..

WildHeart

WildHeart

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A question for all the men folk..and do remember who your talking too.
I am not looking for a candy coated version of your ideas.
I also know that a lot of you just said,"Whatever you want dear.." so you didn't have to do any of the work, but my question is this, if men did all the wedding planning...what besides strippers or nonsense like that, would you have liked to have at your wedding or have had done for your wedding to have made it memorable and more epic?
We will be packing firearms, more on this later..

I am braced and ready for the impact of all the razzing and ridiculousness..go!


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Big Dave I would give up RP's left you know what for either of those things at my wedding...LOL

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The ceremony is all about YOU. Seriously. Just tell RP where to stand.

But he would like a say in what goes on at the reception.
 
Well he's already going to start a wild west showdown during the ceremony, he even has me packing a pistol in my boot. The reception is wide open, as it stands I believe there may even be a redneck pool in the back of a pickup at some point...

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Hahaha, of course! You may be the last to show up, but I will be the LAST woman Brian ever marries..that's the epic last my friend!

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Most men don't give a **** about the actual ceremony. It's enough that someone said yes and committed to tolerating our juvenile behavior. The wedding ceremony is all for you girly. Do what you want and enjoy.

** the above message might be influenced by narcotics and Captain Morgan. Although influenced, it's the truth **

Guardrail
 
Meh! It's not all about me goofy!! If it was we would have eloped a long time ago and had some bizzare story from it!

Moreover we want the kids to be included.
Ya know, the four little people that had the unfortunate luck to be raised by a couple of crazy people.

Send over a bottle of that Captain's..I need a drink too.


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I can't help myself, we have a local liquor distributor here named Major Brands. Sometimes when we're working the same stop together I'll step right up to them and say "Major Brands?" and they'll say "Yes?" and I'll say "Any word from Captain Morgan?" Sometimes the get it, sometimes they just look at me weird because I'm all deadpan. Of course I often ask other drivers what it's like being a Coke dealer.

December 5th 2009

I put everything that I had and everything I could borrow into our wedding, and our church is real friendly, and I work at a food service distributor, so I was able to get the food from my company and we paid the church a nominal fee to use their kitchen to prepare it. The choir director took me aside and said, the ovens work but the knobs don't match up to reality, so you have to use an actual thermometer and adjust the knob to make sure the oven is at the right temp. Well I relayed this info to the soon to be Mrs. and I saw the thermometer she bought, but somewhere along the communication chain...

Anyhow dinner was late, there was a problem, the guests were hungry, and worse, they were drinking at an open bar on an empty stomach. So the Mrs. and I got up and went from table to table and spent a couple of minutes chatting with each guest at each table, this was my wife's Idea and I still don't know how I pulled it off because I hadn't started drinking yet.

As the guests were leaving several of them commented of how nice it was for us to go around and talk to everyone, it was really a nice touch they thought, they had no idea we were stalling.

Hopefully yours will go smoother, especially if there are firearms involved.

Our municipality has a nice facility we rented for the reception that was maybe a two blocks from the church. Diana and I had to take the horse and buggy. One of the things she wanted. One of the things that I wanted? I wanted to make sure there would be no Love Shack by the B52s, I hate those guys, in fact they gave up and let me choose all the music, which may have been a mistake. Do you know what a "mashup" song is? I had the DJ play quite a few of these.

rOqZQNN.jpg


I may have a better picture, but it's on another computer.
 
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Well, I was married once. Lasted 3 1/2 years.

I should have followed my better judgement and kept "living in sin" with her. She didn't want a big shindig, so we planned on getting the deed done while we were camping on the coast with a couple she knew.

We spent most of the week looking for a pastor that would officiate without us actually being part of his flock {one thing I insisted on was an actual religious ceremony, and not the sterile non-religious justice of the peace deal}. We finally found a really nice guy at the local Church of the Nazarene {a Baptist kinda church}, which I though was pretty cool, as I was raised in the Nazarene brand of faith.

The couple we were camping with were the witnesses. Actually it was a surprise to them as we kept it a secret.

On the way to the church I stopped and yanked a bunch of flowers out of a flowerbed at some house down the street from the church, and as I was getting back into the car the old bat whose flowers I had just stolen was running out of the house yelling and screaming, and shaking a broom at me.

I can't repeat the words she was using here.

The ceremony was nice, and afterwards the four of us went out onto the beach {we can drive on the beach were we were} and built a bonfire, popped the cork on a bottle of champagne and had the "reception".

As it was getting dark my new bride told me we were not spending our honeymoon in a tent at the campground, so we got a bungalow cabin thing at a place run by some gay guys. When they figured out we had just been hitched they got all twitterpated and began acting "girly" like gay men do and made a big deal about us being newlyweds.

The first 6 months were great.

Then the relationship began to deteriorate. By the end of the 3rd year I was ready to call it quits. She begged me to give it more time. Six months later I served her the papers and told her to get out.

Three years later I met "Mrs. Racer".

We have been "living in sin" ever since, almost 18 years.

People ask us why we don't get married. Our response is, "Why **** up a good thing?" {apologies for the coarse language, but there is no better way to express it}
 
I'm like the opposite, I found myself living in sin a time or two, felt sort of guilty and when it was ultimately determined that we wouldn't ever be married, I kicked them to the curb.

My first marriage, it hasn't been easy for either of us, we were both single independent adults for a very long time previously. It is getting better and We're very hopeful and optimistic about our future together, and I think what's kept us together is the vow that we made, we took it very serious, in front of God and everybody.

Of course it also helps that she really is the one for me!
 
RacerX69 said:
There will be guns at the wedding?

What is this, a shotgun wedding?
Click to expand...

My dad always thinks it's funny at weddings(all three of my stepsisters weddings) to give you away while packing a shotgun. My father's brand of humor. Well just so happens that my mom has a show pistol, a .45 pearl handled that she is loaning to Brian and I happen to have hidden pockets in my dress, and will be wearing boots perfect places to stash a few of my own, it will all be a show to get my dad to crack up while giving me away.

RacerX69 said:
Three years later I met "Mrs. Racer".

We have been "living in sin" ever since, almost 18 years.

People ask us why we don't get married. Our response is, "Why **** up a good thing?" {apologies for the coarse language, but there is no better way to express it}
Click to expand...

In reality we were okay living like that too but fate has a different idea than we do I guess.
 
WildHeart said:
My dad always thinks it's funny at weddings(all three of my stepsisters weddings) to give you away while packing a shotgun. My father's brand of humor. Well just so happens that my mom has a show pistol, a .45 pearl handled that she is loaning to Brian and I happen to have hidden pockets in my dress, and will be wearing boots perfect places to stash a few of my own, it will all be a show to get my dad to crack up while giving me away.
Click to expand...

We really will need a link to the viral video that you will post on youtube afterwards.

As they say.... pics or it didn't happen.
 
mud said:
Will there be dancing? Can I wear my leisure suit?
Click to expand...

I don't care if you wear a banana hammock, just make sure its kid friendly, and you don't mind being harassed mercilessly by my family..they wouldn't be able to resist ;)

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