being nice practice test

Discussion in 'The Drivers Lounge' started by Smoov, Feb 5, 2014.

  1. Smoov

    Smoov Banned

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    Hello,My name is Juan I have always wanted to drive a big rig. I have had no moving violations in the last 6 month's,( I just got my license restored after being revoked for 6 months) I can pass any drug test and only 1 DUI in the last 2 years. I have run the numbers and decided I want to be my own boss and am looking at a company called Prime Success Leasing. I plan on running my truck about 3 or 4 times a week because I also play in a rock band and need time off for gigs.My question is how do youget a CB handle?

    Sincerely
    Smoov
     
  2. ABFer

    ABFer Super Moderator Staff Member

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    I'm thinking Prime might be a little below your qualifications and I'd recommend Praise the Lord Express out of somewhere in the South. You might want to get Skype so you go play in the band and you have to whittle your own CB handle. Soft woods are easier to work with but a nice one made of Locust or Ironwood conveys manliness and commands the respect of your peers.
     
  3. Smoov

    Smoov Banned

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    Thanks Good Buddy
     
  4. pro1driver

    pro1driver I am LAST

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    being nice practice test....(click onto this)


    well.....i really don't want to be nice to no-juan.........

    but since this is after all a "practice test"........

    i can say this much...

    to get a c.b. handle, you have to give me your credit card number, social security number, driver's license number and home address.....

    then after a while, you will get a free c.b. handle....
     
  5. Guardrail

    Guardrail Super Moderator Staff Member

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    You'll never make it as a driver. You are scum. I am king. You are the **** on the bottom of my shoe. You have no say in the matter. I am top dog around here. Do not question my authority.

    How did I do?

    Guardrail
     
  6. Razorpig

    Razorpig Owned by W@H(itsherfault)

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    So I am new to this whole forum thing but I'll give it a try. Fortunately I am far more experienced and better at truck driving and being a bad ass in general. You see, I graduated driving school three weeks ago and my driver trainer at swift has already cut me loose on my own. Something about no way he is ever getting back in the truck with me again. Now that is confidence in me right there. He seemed really impresed with how smooth the transmission shifted when I start down a hill in low and float it out into neutral until I hit 65 then cram it into high gear. That sure cut down on a lot of grinding noises going through the gear box. Anyway, enough about me and my awesomeness, maybe I'll get into this whole interweb superhighway chat forum thingy. Maybe I will also be great at this too.
     
  7. RacerX69

    RacerX69 Retired Gear Jammer/IBEW Retired/Wingnut

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    Maybe.

    You need a better camera though.
     
  8. Razorpig

    Razorpig Owned by W@H(itsherfault)

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  9. ABFer

    ABFer Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Did you use a fisheye lens to take the motorbike picture?
    You failed with me when you wussed out and put it into gear at 65. See real a real big rigger would never have caved like that. Better try for your CB handle first and see if you could redeem yourself. BTW a purchased CB handle is even lower class than your own hand carved balsa wood version.
     
  10. Razorpig

    Razorpig Owned by W@H(itsherfault)

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    It is a swift truck, I had to give in at 65, the beeping from the Qualcomm was too annoying. That and they said my dispatcher had a small stroke the last time a driver went 67 on a downhill. No, I didn't purchase my CB handle. I stabbed a man in the pinky toe for it. When I heard the name Sparkles, I just had to have it.
     
    1 person likes this.
  11. grocerythrower

    grocerythrower Super Mod

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    Stabbing a man in the pinky toe is low down Bro, stab a man anywhere else, but NEVER the pinky toe!!!!!!!!
     
  12. Razorpig

    Razorpig Owned by W@H(itsherfault)

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    That was on the advice of my driver trainer, then again he did have a foot fetish.
     
  13. grocerythrower

    grocerythrower Super Mod

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    Your driver trainer gave you bad advice, man, if you ever get thrown in prison and they find out you stabbed a dude in the pinky toe....your marked, thats all I can say, prisoners don't take pinky toe stabbing lightly, you better stay on the straight and narrow!! Avoid being locked up at all cost!
     
  14. RacerX69

    RacerX69 Retired Gear Jammer/IBEW Retired/Wingnut

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    You're getting warmer.
     
  15. Razorpig

    Razorpig Owned by W@H(itsherfault)

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    Oops, been here ten minutes and already getting in trouble. Oh well, I don't know any "family friendly" prison jokes so I guess I'll have to just let that one go. Cell block D, a great place to raise a family. Yeah, I got nothing.
     
  16. Smoov

    Smoov Banned

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    Off topic.... please move this to the pinky toe forum
     
  17. Razorpig

    Razorpig Owned by W@H(itsherfault)

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    I looked everywhere for the pinky toe thread and couldn't find it anywhere.
     
  18. ABFer

    ABFer Super Moderator Staff Member

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    Yea, pinky toe offenses don't fare well in prison at all. I know it's a little late for the advice but you should have gone after his dead eye. Dead eye offenses garner much respect inside the prison walls. My grandfather was a Swift trainer for about a year after he died. Then the rat bastards traded him in for a younger model. The trainees were all complaining that he was out of touch with all the new innovations.
     
  19. Razorpig

    Razorpig Owned by W@H(itsherfault)

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    Man, that stinks. I hope after he was treated so poorly at swift he flapped his little angel wings on over to somewhere respectable like CR England or Schneider National. I'm kind of suprised by that story with Swift treating me like a king the way they have. With the incredible reputation they have out on the highway as being the best of the best and the respect we seem to garner from all of the "wish I worked for swift" drivers out there on the highways and byways I can't imagine why they'd let someone go so soon after their untimely demise. Unless he got caught going 66 mph on a downhill that is. According to my dispatcher/trainer/babydaddy they frown on that sort of behavior.
     
  20. pro1driver

    pro1driver I am LAST

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