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From the stupid file

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Stimpy said:
Russian man fills wife's car with cement as revenge for name change

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/04.../?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=5
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A friend who was a foreman on a construction site told me he had a friend who was delivering ready mix to a site he was on. The driver told him he lost part of a load & wanted him to sign for a full load. The driver claimed to have driven by his mobile home & saw his wife's ex's car parked out side. He said he filled up the car to the lower part of the seats then drove off.
 
REAL LIFE NIGHT TERRORS:

Its 2 am and our pups are letting us know that it's time to go out. I'm pulling on my old sweatpants and I realize...my man parts are moving..like never before, when the realization hits me. IT AINT NO PUPPY. SOOOO, I launch myself upward about six feet trying to get the sweats off, while connecting with the ceiling fan, then falling off the bed, with this " movement" still...MOVING. I launch myself skyward again, still trying to separate myself from the sweatpants. Still no deal. Finally after a third launch, I'm able to rid myself of the afficked pants, only to find that this "movement" has now attached itself to my neck. The fight is now on. We're still in the dark...fighting. After what feels like an hour, my wife turns on the light only to find Carbon, our daughters ferret clinging to me for dear life.
 
My three-year-old daughter stuck out her hand and said, “Look at the fly I killed, daddy.” Since she was eating a juicy pickle at the time, 
I thrust her contaminated hands under the faucet and washed them with antibacterial soap.


After sitting her down to finish her pickle, I asked, with a touch of awe, “How did you kill that fly all by yourself?”
Between bites, she said, “I hit it with my pickle.”
 
FLOUNDER said:
My three-year-old daughter stuck out her hand and said, “Look at the fly I killed, daddy.” Since she was eating a juicy pickle at the time, 
I thrust her contaminated hands under the faucet and washed them with antibacterial soap.


After sitting her down to finish her pickle, I asked, with a touch of awe, “How did you kill that fly all by yourself?”
Between bites, she said, “I hit it with my pickle.”
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Sounds like othertrucker could have killed more than a fly with his pickle...lol
 
Apostolic said:
With the warm weather of summer on its way here is a good subject for the Stupid files.

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I watched a show on the travel channel. ... favorite water holes.... there are a bunch of quarries up your way in new York. ... I always thought it was stupid to jump in to the unknown waters.
 
othertrucker2001 said:
REAL LIFE NIGHT TERRORS:

Its 2 am and our pups are letting us know that it's time to go out. I'm pulling on my old sweatpants and I realize...my man parts are moving..like never before, when the realization hits me. IT AINT NO PUPPY. SOOOO, I launch myself upward about six feet trying to get the sweats off, while connecting with the ceiling fan, then falling off the bed, with this " movement" still...MOVING. I launch myself skyward again, still trying to separate myself from the sweatpants. Still no deal. Finally after a third launch, I'm able to rid myself of the afficked pants, only to find that this "movement" has now attached itself to my neck. The fight is now on. We're still in the dark...fighting. After what feels like an hour, my wife turns on the light only to find Carbon, our daughters ferret clinging to me for dear life.
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A niece's ferret found her car keys during the night. She was going to a college class when she discovered her keys were missing. After about an hour long search she found her keys.The college professor was not amused about her excuse for being late for class. He said he thought he had heard all possible excuses for students being tardy.
 
DCM_Doc said:
A niece's ferret found her car keys during the night. She was going to a college class when she discovered her keys were missing. After about an hour long search she found her keys.The college professor was not amused about her excuse for being late for class. He said he thought he had heard all possible excuses for students being tardy.
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Yep. We rearranged the living room once day and found a stash of dog food behind the couch. We thought it was funny. Several months later we replaced the stove. We found nearly a 10 lb bag of dog food lined up against the wall.
 
Stimpy said:
I never had the desire to ever have muscles anything like that. .... to me it a disease similar to anorexia.
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The human body will be what is natural for it with proper diet and exercise. No two people are the same just as no two bodies are the same. Young people often ruin their lives & health trying to be some Hollywood celebrity or professional athlete.
 
Apostolic said:
Is there some point where you can make yourself to healthy?
Here are some folks who went crazy over their good health.

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my dad always used to say, those body builders are fake. that they cannot even lift a paper envelope.

all they do is build up muscle mass, heck we can all do that with some simple workouts.

for me however, i prefer my workout i do daily now, due to my ongoing back problems...

this is me, as of yesterday...

Ugly-Fat-People.jpg
 
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