Joke Thread

Discussion in 'YRC Freight' started by Wrench97, Aug 15, 2010.

  1. twisted-hippie

    twisted-hippie Melon Head

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    Has anybody tried this ? :hysterical::hysterical::hysterical:
    [​IMG]
     
  2. mustache

    mustache Well-Known Member

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    Cleaning Out The Garage...

     
  3. vongrimmenstein

    vongrimmenstein Well-Known Member

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    Why did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? He forgot to wrap his WHOPPER.
     
  4. mysticobra

    mysticobra Just here.

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    OK... Need to start a new joke thread... Lol.
     
  5. vongrimmenstein

    vongrimmenstein Well-Known Member

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    That bad? von.
     
  6. vongrimmenstein

    vongrimmenstein Well-Known Member

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    Ok, a different path. Cowboy walks in to a bar with his horse. Bartender says why the long face. Cowboy says, which one? No? Ok, put 2 lesbians in a closet, add 2 bottles of whiskey, shake & stir, you can now call it a 'Licker Cabinet'. I have to leave now & search for new material. von.
     
  7. mysticobra

    mysticobra Just here.

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  8. Triplex

    Triplex Experienced stalker

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    Elderly driver...

    My neighbor was working in his yard when he was startled by a late-model car that came crashing through his hedge and ended up in his front lawn.

    He rushed to help an elderly lady driver out of the car and sat her down on a lawn chair.

    He said with excitement, "You appear quite elderly to be driving. What is your name?"

    She said my name is Penelope. "Well, yes, I am elderly," she replied proudly. "I'll be 97 next month, and I am now old enough, that I don't even need a driver's license anymore."

    He asked "What do you mean, everyone needs a license to drive?"

    She responded, "The last time I went to my doctor, he examined me and asked if I had a driver's license. I told him yes, and handed it to him. He took scissors out of the drawer, cut the license into pieces, and threw them in the waste basket, saying,'You won't need this anymore.' So I thanked him and left!"
     
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  9. Triplex

    Triplex Experienced stalker

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    Two businessmen in a new shopping mall were sitting down for a break in their soon-to-be-opening new shop.

    As yet, the shop wasn't ready, with only a few shelves set up.

    One said to the other, "I bet any minute now some retiree is going to walk by, put their face to the window, and ask what we're selling."

    No sooner were the words out of his mouth when, sure enough, a curious old guy walked up to the window, had a peek, and asked, "What are you selling here?"

    One of the men replied sarcastically, "We're selling ass-holes."

    Without skipping a beat, the retiree said, “Must be doing well, Only two left."


    Moral of the story, don't mess with the older crowd!
     
  10. mustache

    mustache Well-Known Member

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  11. seabreeze

    seabreeze Not Well Known Member, 60 Year Teamster Member

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    Policeman escorted a man whose wife was missing into the morgue to identify a body.
    He removed the sheet, the man began to cry hysterically, policeman says I'm very sorry
    I see you and your wife must have been very close.
    Guy says "I hated her guts" Well why are crying?
    ITS NOT HER
     
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  12. seabreeze

    seabreeze Not Well Known Member, 60 Year Teamster Member

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    I may be on the wrong thread because this story is true!!
    When I retired from trucking in1990, I took a couple of online courses and became a doctor
    While working in the emergency room, a guy came in yelling "MY WIFE IS HAVING HER BABY IN THE CAB OUTSIDE"
    I grabbed my bag, ran to the cab and started pulling off her underwear, I suddenly realized there were several cabs around.
    I was in the wrong cab.
     
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