Off-Topic Joke Thread

Rep. Rangel vows not to retire; says President Obama needs him in office




JECKO.gif
 
>>
>> THE JOURNEY OF MAN!!!



>> When I was 13, I hoped that one day I would have a
>> girlfriend with big tits.
>>
>> When I was 16 I got a girlfriend with big tits, but there
>> was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with
>> a zest for life.
>>
>> Later I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional.
>> Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried
>> all the time and threatened *******.
>>
>> So I decided I needed a girl with stability.
>>
>> When I was 25 I found a very stable girl but she was
>> boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited
>> about anything. Life became so dull that I decided that I
>> needed a girl with some excitement.
>>
>> When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep
>> up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never
>> settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made
>> me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially
>> and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find
>> a girl with some real ambition.
>>
>> When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her
>> feet planted firmly on the ground, so I married her. She was
>> so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I
>> owned.
>>
>> I am older and wiser now, and I am looking for a girl with
>> big tits.....
>>
>>
>>
>
 
And that's why you should always set the parking brake on both the tractor and the trailer before getting out of the seat..........whether your upside down or right side up.................:hysterical:
 
Not Really A Joke

POEM - Illegal Immigrants


I cross river,
poor and broke,

Take bus,
see employment folk.

Nice man
treat me good in there,
Say I need
go see Welfare.

Welfare say,
'You come no more,

We send cash
right to your door.'

Welfare checks,
they make you wealthy,

Medicaid
it keep you healthy!

By and by,
Got plenty money,

Thanks to you, TAXPAYER dummy.

Write to friends
in motherland,

Tell them
'come, fast as you can'

They come in buses
and Ford trucks,

I buy big house
with welfare bucks.

They come here,
we live together,

More welfare checks,
it gets better!

Fourteen families,
they moving in,

But neighbor's patience
wearing thin.

Finally, white guy
moves away,
..
I buy his house,
and then I say,

'Find more aliens
for house to rent.'

In my yard
I put a tent.

Send for family
they just trash,
...
But they, too,
draw welfare cash!

Everything is
very good,
Soon we own
whole neighborhood..

We have hobby
it called breeding,

Welfare pay
for baby feeding.

Kids need dentist?
Wife need pills?

We get free!
We got no bills!

TAXPAYER crazy!
He pay all year,
To keep my welfare
running here.

We think America
darn good place!
Too darn good
for white man race.

If they no like us,
they can go,
Got lots of room
in Mexico
 
POEM - Illegal Immigrants


I cross river,
poor and broke,

Take bus,
see employment folk.

Nice man
treat me good in there,
Say I need
go see Welfare.

Welfare say,
'You come no more,

We send cash
right to your door.'

Welfare checks,
they make you wealthy,

Medicaid
it keep you healthy!

By and by,
Got plenty money,

Thanks to you, TAXPAYER dummy.

Write to friends
in motherland,

Tell them
'come, fast as you can'

They come in buses
and Ford trucks,

I buy big house
with welfare bucks.

They come here,
we live together,

More welfare checks,
it gets better!

Fourteen families,
they moving in,

But neighbor's patience
wearing thin.

Finally, white guy
moves away,
..
I buy his house,
and then I say,

'Find more aliens
for house to rent.'

In my yard
I put a tent.

Send for family
they just trash,
...
But they, too,
draw welfare cash!

Everything is
very good,
Soon we own
whole neighborhood..

We have hobby
it called breeding,

Welfare pay
for baby feeding.

Kids need dentist?
Wife need pills?

We get free!
We got no bills!

TAXPAYER crazy!
He pay all year,
To keep my welfare
running here.

We think America
darn good place!
Too darn good
for white man race.

If they no like us,
they can go,
Got lots of room
in Mexico

_________
TEN.gif
 
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